Okay, so his credit card is maxed, his boss hates him, his father is a world-class alcoholic and his hairline, like the country, is showing signs of recession. But everything will come right if he sticks to his New Year's resolutions. All he needs to do to get his life back on track is bag himself a great new job, lose 9 kgs, get a girlfriend (blonde, not too much admin) and get 250 Facebook friends without too many freaks. Easy. Or so he tells himself. But in reality the odds are stacked against the Jasonator. He may have the best collection of branded jeans in the paint retail industry - and, let's face it, nothing is more important than that, right? - but turning his life around is going to require a lot more than just a change of trousers (although this, too, may well be on the cards). Will this be the year that Jason finally gets it together and gets one over those who are intent on dragging him down - his boss, the body corporate, estate agents, his sickeningly successful friends . . . or will it be known forever as the year of the gherkin?